I bought a fan for my bedroom and I think it might be made out of papier mache; at least that's how much it weighs. Have I committed a socioecoglobalpoliticalethical crime by purchasing this fan? It came from a big box store, but it was a Canadian big box store so that's not as bad right? Could we make the same thing out of bamboo or gourds or something? We don't have to re-invent electricity, just build a better vessel for it. Something as cost effective and less flimsy. The thing has two pages of instructions, 2/3 of which is devoted to warnings, cautions and rules. Really, there are only 15 parts and 11 steps to assembling it but there are 16 Rules, 3 warnings and 2 cautions - in fact the whole thing sounds vaguely threatening. I wonder how many rules they began with and what lawsuit/insurance claim prompted them to write each one. I love "Repairs made by unqualified electricians will void this product's warranty." Like if this thing dies you'd call an electrician. More likely you'd put it in a yard sale - some smart ass will believe he can fix and buy it off you for a buck.
Two of the warnings - in bold mind you - have to do with never using any solid-state speed control device with the fan. While it's not strictly speaking a speed control device - it's much more than that - I'm wondering if my vibrator is solid-state? Wasn't solid-state the technological breakthrough of the 50's? Wait was that when batteries were invented....oh never mind.
The last two rules are my favourites - "15. Use this fan only as it is described in this manual." You would think that would cover pretty much every body's ass and they could stop there, but no, there is a number "16. Do not leave the fan running unattended." Sounds ominous. If I leave the room, are the fans going to start doing something they don't feel comfortable doing when I'm in the room? Are they the ones eating my ice cream? What does my fan do when I'm not here? I'm dying to know. Maybe I'll set up a nanny cam for my fan - a fanny cam. And on that note.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment